.Publisher's Note: The observing is actually the content of a letter coming from Trip Three Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Retired), reassessing the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written significantly about specifics of this goal in the course of the month I've been here, generally for pair of reasons: the 1st being that there has actually been actually really little time to do that kind of composing, and also secondly considering that I'm not sure just how comfortable I am discussing ideas I show to family and friends along with the remainder of the world.Well, certainly the globe altered today. What I claim or even perform is actually incredibly slight contrasted to the implication of what happened to our country today when it was assaulted by ... through whom? Terrorists is actually all we understand, I think. Difficult to know at whom to direct our temper and concern ...I had just completed an amount of duties this morning, the most taxing being the physical exams of all staff participants. In a private conversation complying with that, the flight specialist told me they were actually having an incredibly poor day on the ground. I had no suggestion ...He defined the situation to me as greatest he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually amazed, then horrified. My very first thought was actually that this wasn't a real discussion, that I was actually still listening closely to one of my Tom Clancy strips. It only failed to seem feasible on this scale in our country. I couldn't even envision the details, also prior to the information of more devastation began can be found in.Vladimir visited pretty quickly, sensing that one thing very major was being actually reviewed. I swayed Michael into the component as well. They were actually likewise impressed and also stunned. After our team signed off, I made an effort to describe to Vladimir and also Michael as finest I could the potential size of the show of terror in midtown Manhattan and also at the Pentagon. They plainly comprehended and also were quite supportive.I eyed the Planet Map on the pc to see where over the world our company were and also saw that our company were actually coming southeast away from Canada and also would be actually overlooking New England in a handful of minutes. I zoomed around the station until I found a home window that would certainly give me a viewpoint of NYC as well as got the nearby camera. It occurred to be a camera, and also I was appearing southern from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to possess a strange blossom to it at the base of the column that was streaming south of the city. After checking out one of the newspaper article our company simply acquired, I think our team were actually considering NY around the amount of time of, or soon after, the collapse of the second tower. How unpleasant ...I panned the cam all along the East Shore to the south to find if I could possibly see any other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or even anywhere else, however nothing showed up.It was actually fairly hard to think about job afterwards, though our team had some to carry out, but on the following orbit we went across the US further southern. All three people were operating 1 or 2 video cameras to attempt to obtain viewpoints of New york city or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, yet no particular source may be observed. All of it looked awesome from two to three hundred kilometers away. I can not imagine the tragic settings on the ground.Besides the psychological impact of our nation being actually tackled and countless our people as well as possibly some friends being actually eliminated, the absolute most overwhelming sensation being where I am actually is one of seclusion.Following time ... I think the fatigue as well as mental tension acquired the most effective of me. I couldn't remain awake and also remain to create. Today was actually still complicated, however our team began obtaining additional information, plus we had the respect of talking directly with the Facility Supervisor, Roy Estess, who ensured our company that the ground crews would certainly continue to operate and ensure our safety and security, and also the risk-free function of the Station. Our team additionally talked to our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the companions in the Course are all completely dedicated to continuing risk-free procedures as well as help. These were never concerns for me. I understand all these individuals! The ground groups have actually been actually incredibly supportive, incredibly understanding of the impact of the updates, as well as have tried to be as beneficial as achievable. They have all been really qualified as well as concentrated though I can not think of the distraction of this type of updates can be found in as well as the thought that authorities structures could be at risk. They never missed a beat, also when transferring nerve center. And also a team of senior personnel and close friends gave our company a pretty extensive instruction about what was actually known as well as what was actually being actually performed in the authorities and at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was incredibly practical and also type of them to carry out in the middle of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has actually likewise been actually helpful as well as practical, trying to uplink news articles when our own resources were actually unusable, and saying kind phrases ...My crewmates have been actually great, too. They know it's been actually a hard time for me and also the people on the ground, as well as they've tried to be as even keeled and also handy as possible. Michael even corrected me my preferred Borscht soup for dinner. And they provide me plenty of room to think when I required it. They are really considerate as well as certainly outraged at whoever would do this.I understand a lot of people in Washington, many individuals who travel to DC and also New York City, many that are flies, that I really felt certain I will get at least a couple of items of problem over the next couple of days. I acquired the 1st one today when I learned that the Leader of the American Airlines plane that reached the Pentagon was actually Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I found Chic during plebe summer season when our experts were in the D&B together, as well as we possessed great deals of classes with each other. I can not picture what he should of experienced, and also currently I hear that he may have risen additionally than our experts may even consider through possibly avoiding his plane coming from being the one to attack the White House. What a dreadful reduction, however I make certain Chic was battling bravely to the end. And also rips do not move the exact same in space ...It is actually hard to describe just how it feels to be the only United States totally off the earth each time like this. The feeling that I ought to exist along with each of you, dealing with this, helping in some way, is actually frustrating. I understand that our company get on the threshold (or even past) of a horrible shift in the record of the globe. Several traits will certainly never coincide once more after September 11, 2001. Certainly not simply for the manies thousand and thousands of individuals straight had an effect on through these ghastly actions of terrorism, yet possibly for everyone. Our company will certainly locate our own selves really feeling differently regarding lots of things, including perhaps space expedition, regrettably.It is actually horrendous to see smoke cigarettes putting from wounds in your very own nation from such an awesome angle. The dichotomy of being on a space capsule dedicated to strengthening life on the earth and also enjoying life being destroyed through such deliberate, dreadful process is jolting to the subconscious, no matter who you are actually. And the understanding that every thing are going to be various than when our team released by the time our team land is actually a little disconcerting. I believe in our country and also in our management that our company will certainly perform every little thing achievable to much better defend her and also our loved ones, and to take justice wherefore has actually been actually done. I possess assurance that the great people at NASA are going to perform every thing important to proceed our purpose safely and securely and also return us securely at the correct time. And I overlook all of you quite. I can't exist along with you in person, and also our experts have a very long way to visit complete our goal, but be actually specific that my heart is with you, and also know you reside in my requests.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the final character ... Luckily, it's been a hectic week up below. And also to show that, like our nation, we are actually advancing our desired course with service as usual (as high as feasible). Tonight the current enhancement to the place, the Russian Docking Compartment will definitely be actually released from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday evening (US opportunity), it will dock with us, at a slot never utilized before on the nadir side of the Company Component. This brand-new module will certainly give our team another location to dock a Progress or Soyuz and will certainly give a large airlock along with pair of useable hatches for carrying out EVA's in Russian Orlan satisfies, which we are going to do a few of just before we come home.The issue before in dealing with recently was actually inadequate information. The problem today is actually a lot of. It arrived simultaneously when email was rejuvenated, and also there is actually not enough time to read it all! Plus it is actually too difficult to cope with all of it instantly. But I enjoy obtaining it, and also I truly cherish the wonderful characters of help and also friendship I am actually acquiring.Our experts are flourishing on board, obtaining our job done, and also discussing things. Final night our experts possessed a lengthy dialogue over dinner concerning the implication of these activities, the achievable actions to observe, and also what ought to be carried out. After supper, Michael made a point of telling me that every e-mail he got coming from close friends in Russia stated primarily to tell me exactly how sorry they were that this occurred, stretching their condolences, as well as inquiring exactly how I was actually performing. Vladimir taught me the Russian phrase for "condolences" after consulting with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian and also the English words are actually a lot extremely lengthy to articulate easily.) Very kind people.For the last 2 days, the Russian MCC has been good enough to transfer online shows of broadcast updates concerning the occasion and associated accounts, to make certain I was actually effectively notified. Every specialist who has actually come on free throw line to cover an operation or a complication has at some factor extended greetings to me with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom told our team that as a result of the special day of remembrance in the United States, throughout the day individuals had actually been actually taking florals as well as edging all the walls of the US consular office in Moscow, as well as this night they were actually igniting candles in the road outside the consular office. How the world has actually transformed.Individuals everywhere appear to recognize the senselessness and terror in this particular strike. And the incredible reduction. Moscow has handled these type of complications in the last couple of years with condo and subway battles, so they are actually as distressed to do away with this risk as we are actually. However the bottom series is actually that there are actually really good people everywhere that intend to live in tranquility. I go through that a child inquired, "United States is thus really good to various other countries, our team consistently aid everyone, exactly how can they hate us so much?".I wish the example of teamwork as well as trust that this spacecraft plus all the people in the system show daily will one day influence the rest of the planet to function the same way. They must!Unfortunately, our company will not be flighting over the US during the time people are igniting candles. Do not understand if our company might observe that anyhow. Our experts carried out, nevertheless, observe a really uncommon as well as gorgeous view a couple of mins ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz enhancer. Our experts were eclipsing it and also it came into view about 3 mins after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sun hit our terminal, so it was still at night. It appeared like a sizable comet with a directly, broad rear silhouetted against the black earth beneath. Despite some negative illumination for some time as the sun attacked our window at a reduced angle, I dealt with some video clip of it as initially our team passed the spacecraft, and then viewed it start to mesmerize as it got height and rate. I filmed till major engine deadline as well as booster splitting up occurred equally as our experts approached daybreak on the Mountain ranges. A memorable sight in a memorable full week ...Life goes on, even precede. Our experts are actually here to stay ... Frank.